Sunday, October 27, 2013

NFL Picks: Week 8

The Rams called Brett Favre this week, and after he turned them down, the decided to go with Kellen Clemens on Monday night. 2008 Jets throwback! I'm sure Brett Ratliff (5) is be better than Clemens. Photo from
What an annoying week for me. I lost the my Buccaneers pick by 1 point, and I lost my Ravens pick by half a point. And if that weren't enough, Jay Cutler got injured in the first quarter, and Josh McCown actually played well, giving me hope that I would get my pick right. Then of course, Roy Helu scored a touchdown with 45 seconds left to win the game and hand me a loss. So thanks for the false hope Josh, if you had played terribly that would have been my excuse. Also, I started Cutler over King Kaepernick on my fantasy team, and I still won with my -1 points from the QB spot.

Speaking of last second losses, Brandon Weeden had the ball with 1st and Goal on the Packers 7 yard line, down by 18. The line just so happened to be 11, so if he was able to punch it in, then I would have mercifully escaped with a push. So what does Weeden do? Turnover on downs of course! And so ends the Brandon Weeden era, because he was officially benched this week. I will not miss him.

My inconsistent Jets decided to show up last week. Which I should have expected, because they have alternated good and bad games all year. It's so hard to anticipate what they are going to do in any particular game.

Boy was Josh Freeman awful. That was Gabbert + Weeden level bad. Yeah, he played like the disgusting combination of those two useless quarterbacks. Blaindon Gabben? That's how bad Josh Freeman was. And I'm still not breaking up with him. I can't take the pain that comes with the 0.37% chance that he returns to form and becomes good again.

Onto this week, where I can take solace in the fact that I got my Thursday night pick correct.

Well I felt pretty damn good about it pretty much as soon as the game started. The Panthers are good because their defense is so great. Specifically, it is their front seven being so good, and therefore having the ability to mask the weaknesses present in the secondary. It's working, and the Panthers have a shot at the playoffs this year.

So I'm 6-2 on Thursday night games, and 55-52-2 on the season. I have no idea how I'm still over .500 with the awful streak I've been on lately. Let's do this!

UPSET ALERT next to games in which I think the underdog will win outright, not just cover. Home team in CAPS. 

LIONS (-3) over Cowboys. I feel bad for picking against the Cowboys once again, but unlike the Bengals last week, the Lions aren't going up against a good defense. In what should be a shootout (of course, everyone said that before Cowboys/Eagles last week) the Lions should win at home.

CHIEFS (-7.5) over Browns. For the second time this season, the Browns any trying to put an abrupt end to the Brandon Weeden era. Hopefully for the sake of the city of Cleveland, Jason Campbell doesn't get hurt, so they aren't forced to watch this guy again. Please take a moment to digest how awful that video is. As for the Chiefs, I was disappointed that they didn't cover against Case Keenum last week, but I can't pick against them. Even though Jason Campbell once again makes me feel secure owning Jordan Cameron and Josh Gordon in fantasy football.

PATRIOTS (-6) over Dolphins. Neither team has been too great so far. The Patriots are all out of sorts, now that Vince Wilfork and Jerod Mayo are out for the year, and Tom Brady is 29th in the NFL in Completion Percentage. He has looked so off this year, and while I don't think he's completely done for as a quarterback, he is 36 years old, and he may just be in decline. He should turn it around somewhat by the end of the year, but so far he's been mediocre at best. And yet, the Pats should cover this against a Dolphins team that looks pretty bad right now. Ryan Tannehill has a ton of potential, and has done some great things, but is playing a porous offensive line, and has been on his back way too many times thus far. That's not necessarily a weakness that the Patriots can exploit, but Rob Gronkowski, Stevan Ridley, and Danny Amendola will easily be the best skill position players on the field, which spells doom for the Dolphins, even with a messed up Tom Brady.

Bills (+12) over SAINTS. Okay, I've bought into the Saints. They are a good team, with a good defense thanks to Rob Ryan actually living up to his last name for the first time. But, in this particular game, I can't pick them. I know that it's very possible for the final score to be Saints 38, Bills 3, but I'm taking that risk. Thad Lewis looked good, and the Saints run defense is still weak, which Fred Jackson can take advantage of. Also, the Buffalo pass rush is playing really good, so they might be able to disrupt Drew Brees.

EAGLES (-5) over Giants. I would have picked the Giants if Matt Barkley were starting, but it seems that Michael Vick will be back this week. The Eagles are better than the Giants. The Giants happened to run into Josh Freeman doing Josh Freeman things on Monday night, and would have lost if he showed any sort of competence during the game.

49ers (-15) over "JAGUARS" (Game will be played in London). The Jaguars in London. What a great way to build up the international fan base! That'll really get those Brits turned onto this version of football! Nothing like seeing the worst team in the league get pummeled by one of the best teams in the league. This is why we love it so much in this here country. Join the party England.

BENGALS (-5.5) over Jets. After playing well, it's time for an awful performance by the Jets. I don't even know what to say about them anymore. They're so ridiculously inconsistent that it's almost pointless for me to make any predictions about them. As for the Bengals, missing Leon Hall for the rest of the season is a really big deal. In fact, I'm willing to say that his Achilles injury puts the nail in the coffin of my Super Bowl prediction for them. I could be wrong, and Terence Newman, Dre Kirkpatrick, and Adam Jones step up in his absence, but I'm not counting on them to match his level of play.

RAIDERS (+3) over Steelers. Here comes the "Steelers are actually good" supporters making silly arguments about how they have a chance to make the playoffs. They don't. Not only that, they are a bad team that will lose to a team that might be even better. This is also the classic "Steelers shouldn't lose this" game that they tend to throw away every single year. UPSET ALERT.

BRONCOS (-11) over Washington Professional Football Team. The Washington defense is awful. Their offense has looked much better recently; RGIII is back to his 2012 form, which gives them a chance to challenge for the division crown, but not to challenge in this game.

CARDINALS (-1) over Falcons. I'm going with the home team here. Neither team is much better than the other, so you shouldn't expect anyone to pull away in this one. The Cardinals biggest weakness is their offensive line, but the Falcons won't really do anything that exposes that disadvantage.

Packers (-9) over VIKINGS. Christian Ponder is back because of Josh Freeman's concussion. Yeah...

Seahawks (-11.5) over RAMS. Speaking of quarterbacks who are starting because of injury, the Rams will have an interesting guy under center on Monday.

I don't even want to type his name...

Photo from
Whatever, I'll just say it... Kellen Clemens is starting for the Rams. He's probably not that much worse than Sam Bradford, but I can tell you from experience, he's terrible. Good luck Rams fans. They called Brett Favre to play over this guy...

Last Week: 6-9
This Week: 1-0
Season: 55-52-2

No comments:

Post a Comment